Want to Start a Well Circle? Here's What Priya Parker Might Advise.

In this series, we're imagining what advice famous women would give you for starting a Well Circle — a small group of 6-12 who meet at each new moon. Priya Parker was not involved in the creation of this advice. (If you want to write this article for real, Priya, just say the word!)
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If you asked for help organizing a Rosh Chodesh circle to meet at each new moon, the gathering maven Priya Parker, author of The Art of Gathering, would likely begin with one question:

Why are you gathering? Not the logistical reason. The deeper one.

The biggest mistake hosts make, Priya says, is focusing too much on format — the snacks, the agenda, the location — instead of the purpose of the gathering.

So if you're starting a Well Circle, you should begin with clarity about what you're truly seeking. Is the purpose reflection? Support? Spiritual growth? Friendship? Learning?

When the purpose is clear, everything else becomes easier.

The purpose helps you clarify who is the right match for your circle. (You might think it's easiest to just start your circle quickly with whoever is willing to try it. But we've found that your circle will gel best if you find people who are looking for the same kind of experience that you are. It's OK to say no to someone, or for them to say no to you.)

In fact, Priya teaches that gatherings become meaningful when they have a specific purpose that some people might disagree with or opt out of. She calls this a "clear, disputable purpose" and says it's key to helping the right people say yes and the wrong people say no, which strengthens the gathering.

So what is the purpose of your Well Circle? A good purpose often finishes this sentence:

“This gathering exists so that…”

For example: “This gathering exists so that Jewish women navigating big life changes can feel less alone.”

Or: "This circle exists for women and nonbinary folks to explore life’s biggest questions—purpose, identity, spirituality—through Jewish wisdom and shared conversation."

Or: "This circle exists for women who want conversations that go beyond small talk."

Or: "This circle exists for moon enthusiasts who want to learn how the Hebrew Calendar can guide their souls."

As Priya said on a podcast recently,

A Well Circle isn’t just a meeting. It’s a container.

And when the container is thoughtfully designed, people know what they're opting into. Then, they feel freer to bring their full selves inside it.

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Feeling inspired to gather? Learn how to start your own Well Circle and connect with women and nonbinary folks in your community.