Why This Month Has Always Been One of My Very Favorites
Elul has always been one of my favorite months in the Hebrew calendar.
Out of all the vast wisdom that Jewish tradition holds, this month’s teachings are some of the absolute most vital for our spiritual and physical well-being. Elul speaks to a deep and universal human need: it gives us a path to heal the harm that we have experienced and the harm that we have caused.
As the final month in the Jewish calendar year, this is the season set aside by our Sages for us to turn inward, take stock of our lives, and notice when we have missed the mark.
(“Missing the mark” is a Jewish interpretation of when we have failed to show up as the best versions of ourselves, or have broken our commitments.) This is the time for looking back — and seeing what we need in order to move forward.
The self-reflection of Elul is a spiritual awareness practice, not a judgment practice.
We turn toward ourselves with honesty, with love, and hope for growth. As we meet ourselves in this movement and review our lives through a lens of loving kindness, we get the opportunity to step into alignment with our most authentic selves and in deepest partnership with our communities and the oneness of the world.
Growing up, I was taught to always reflect and ask for forgiveness from those close to me each fall before “the gates of heaven closed” at the end of Yom Kippur. This process has become embedded into my sense of the rhythms of the year.
What I love is that the techniques we practice in Elul are wise, adaptable, unique, and open to all.
Jewish wisdom offers a roadmap desperately missing from our modern life, allowing us to reach a place of forgiveness for ourselves and others.
I’ve seen firsthand the beauty and possibility that Elul can reveal.
Years ago, when a close friend and I were struggling through the most challenging time in our relationship, we used Elul as an opportunity to commit to talking to each other throughout the whole month. We studied lines of sacred text about Elul and then used it as a jumping-off point for our conversations.
The text allowed for us to open up, begin to share, and to have tough conversations with love. Jewish wisdom became our medicine for reuniting, and I got to experience firsthand the flood of love that can pour in to fill a rupture when we find ourselves able to forgive. It is life-affirming and nourishing for our wholeness.
I have wondered what my community and even the world might look like if we turned the month of Elul into a truly collective practice.
What if it became completely commonplace that, every fall, the entire world would do this spiritual work at the same time, together, out loud and in our own hearts? What reconciliations might we see? What new understanding and compassion could flourish? What human potential might we achieve?
Some pain might not be possible to forgive. Some rifts will take longer than a month to heal and create justice. That’s natural. This month of Elul allows us to open up a space for reconciliation — in the relationships where repair is possible. Day by day, we can begin to take ownership of our words and actions, and to find the language for our most complicated feelings.
In fact, Jewish wisdom teaches us that we are each doing our individual work alongside each other, in deep community with other people and, of course, the Divine. This year, with Season of the Heart hosted inside the At The Well Collective membership, it’s even clearer how we are each walking on our own path in a shared communal journey.
This Elul, I’m dreaming of everything that might be possible if each one of us committed to healing our relationships with one another, with ourselves, and with the land that sustains us.
If we could do that, as a society and as a world, just imagine what else could be possible.
With hope,
Sarah Waxman
Founder & CEO, At The Well
Sarah is the founder and CEO of At The Well. She brings extensive experience in sociology and holistic medicine, combined with her background as a national champion athlete and certified instructor in yoga and mindfulness. As an active leader in the Jewish community, Sarah has developed a profound understanding of the transformative power of supportive communities, spiritual connection, and cyclical awareness. She founded At The Well to create a sanctuary where individuals can be witnessed and witness others, fostering meaningful connections between Jewish heritage and contemporary life through shared learning and authentic community building.
Sarah graduated from the University of Pennsylvania. She lives in her hometown of Washington, D.C., with her family.